It’s probably time I admit my lack of control with alcohol. Well, I have before. I recently went three weeks without drinking to prove to myself I didn’t need it and I don’t have a problem.
I don’t need it. I’ve learned that. I know that.
However, when go out with certain friends I binge. I binge hard. I keep going. One after the other. It’s ridiculous and concerning.
I’ve stopped smoking cold turkey several times over the years.
Yet when I go out, without the boys, out with my friends, when we meet for drinks I go all out.
I do things that leave me embarrassed and ashamed. I wake up sick with regret.
The worse thing is I drive. That is what is causing me the most grief and shame.
I will no longer do that. My boys need me. Dammit I’m done.